There's probably only one thing that almost all humans have in common - the love for sex. The thing is though, some of us also seem to live our sex life by astrological predictions.
Especially women - women love reading about their horoscopes and their zodiac signs. Digging out similarities and probabilities that are relevant to their life. And when the time comes where life gets messy, Mercury is always in retrograde.
But men - men don't buy into this concept easily - "oof astrology? really?" "that's not a thing dude" - but its mainly because we all know astrology is a feminine thing, right? Yeah, it probably is - following cycles? being moody? reading something to feel better? - pretty much what we go through.
But for all you anti-astrology bros and dudes, here's one piece on astrology you might want to read because it's based on your favorite hobby - sex.
Here we go!
Aries (March 21 to April 19):
Okay so, we know that Aries is a fiesty sign - full of temper tantrums and aggressive attitudes - they're little fireballs. But if you really want energetic, adventurous, and not-so vanilla sex, find an Aries and go at it like bunnies. The need to explore for Aries is at an all-time high though, so bust out all your fresh moves or they might last for like 5 seconds and maybe yawn through it. And do not shy away from all the weird fetishes you have - toes? toys? bondage? - anything. Just go for it.
Taurus (April 20 to May 20):
A Taurus is the most stubborn ass bitch you will ever meet. But, their sex is good. Like, extraordinary. But they love sticking to one position - probably missionary - but they like that stability of just one position. They love subtle hints of sexual longing - lingerie, massages, hickeys and food! That's right, food. Taurus loves two things - food and sex. Mix the two? Bingo. Aphrodisiacs like strawberries are their weakness. So when you meet a Taurus turn your A-game on - but be subtle about it.
Gemini (May 21 to June 20):
If you're a no strings attached kinda person - hunt down a Gemini. The best thing you can do to a Gemini? Be submissive. Gemini's love being in control when it comes to sex, so give in to your submissive urges and let your Gemini buddy do what they like. Dirty talking, and switching up positions turn on a Gemini like nothing else. So if you ever want to let loose and just have sex with no regrets, find yourself a Gemini.
Cancer (June 21 to July 22):
Here's the person you go to for some soft, passionate and loving sex. Cancers are literal softies that get turned on by deep intimate connections. So making intense eye contact, cuddling, spooning and even hand-holding turns them on. But even though they do have a soft spot - they are here to provide. They are known to be one of the best in the sex game - with the right moves and the right amount of intimacy. Cancers are basically the equivalent of soft boys.
Leo (July 23 to August 22):
Talk about being just over the top dramatic and that's just a regular Leo. Extra in the streets, extra in the sheets. Leos love being the center of attention so threeways and orgies are out of question. But, a Leo knows how to satisfy as long as the favor is returned. They are turned on by excessive attention, fancy dates and grand romantic gestures. If you make them the center of attention, there's a 100% possibility for multiple orgasms.
Virgo (August 23 to September 22):
Virgos come very close to Geminis - they love exploring. But in this case, they are the submissive person - and not just in a "do what you want daddy" kind of way - but in a "publicly humiliate me" kind of way. The only thing though is never criticize a Virgo's technique, they're perfectionists so the moment you tell them somethings wrong they'll probably zip up and bounce.
Libra (September 23 to October 22):
Two words - elegant and refined. Libra's are one of the most flirtatious signs so they can make their way into your pants pretty easily. But their love for aesthetics and elegance may cancel out the possibilities for bathroom or public sex. They get easily turned on by the lightest of flirting and are extremely giving in bed - but, they expect the same from you. A classic 69 is their idea of the best sex ever, so turn over your Libra partner and indulge in the classic 69-er.
Scorpio (October 23 to November 21):
The epitome of sexual desire and satisfaction, Scorpios stand at the top of the sexual hierarchy. A Scorpio, though sexually charged. has a careful screening process for a sexual partner. The need to have a partner all to themselves is important, so hookups and one night stands are definitely off the table. Direct sexual contact and boldness turn on a Scorpio more than anything else. This is the most sexually outgoing sign so literally nothing is off the table experimentally.
Sagittarius (November 22 to December 21):
Philosophical and optimistic, Sagittarians are up for anything. They love intimacy but wouldn't put an opportunity for a one night stand past them. They love thrill and danger when it comes to sex, so testing the boundaries like choking and outdoor sex is a big turn on for them. They are also very open about sex and aren't afraid to ask for what they want. Sex with a Sagittarius is a guaranteed fun trip.
Capricorn (December 22 to January 19):
Horny and determined - Capricorns will try pretty much anything and be really good at it even if its a first. No emotions, just sex is their mantra. They are dedicated to making their partner feel satisfied and they love being in charge. But they are secretly kinky - and not just in an "oh I like toes" kinda way, but in a "lets role play as Shrek" kinda way. They don't like the subtleties and love going straight to the point - sex.
Aquarius (January 20 to February 18):
If it's unconventional an Aquarius is going to do it. Furry kinks, Barney the Dinosaur roleplays and tickle fetishes are all welcome. They're rebels at heart so they make sure to break the rules of sex too, they love pushing boundaries and trying out of the box kinks. Sex toys are their weakness, any sex gadgets for that matter are their indulgence. So if you want a batshit crazy sex life, dial every Aquarius you know and get some.
Pisces (February 19 to March 20):
This is Osho's dream come true - spiritual sex and a whole lot of passion and love. For them, sex is probably not even the right word - lovemsaking that's the term. Sensuality and pleasure turn on a Pisces the most. Tantric sex, yogic sex and pretty much anything else that involves spiritual elements is what Pisces like. They're the most compassionate sign and look at sex in a strictly passionate and worldly sense.
So, hopefully, you learned something about your sex life from this little piece and got an idea for the kind of sexual partner you're looking for! Astrology isn't all that bad after all huh?